My writing

[Anonyme]

The 2nd topic :
Dear Aïcha,
I hope you’re fine.
I’m writing this e-mail to complain about my miserable life with my obstinate parents. My relationship with them is getting worse and worse as I grow older. They don’t give me enough freedom to make my own dicisions. In fact, they interfere in every thing concerning my clothes, my hair style and even my friends. Plus, can you believe that they don’t give me pocket money ! Each time I ask for money, they tell me that I don’t need it and that they are providing me with everything I need.

So what do you think my friend I have to do to reach a solution with them ?
I really want to end my miserable life and have a better new relationship with my parents.
Please answer me as soon as you can.
Yours Mariem

[Bakhta Prof Anglais]

Dear Mariem, thanks for your participation. Your writing is good. Your language is fine. Your ideas are well-organized. Very good, keep going on 
Here is your correction:
Dear Aïcha,
I hope you’re fine.
I’m writing this e-mail to complain about my miserable life with my obstinate parents. My relationship with them is getting worse and worse as I grow older. They don’t give me enough freedom to make take my own dicisions decisions. In fact, they interfere in every thing everything concerning my clothes, my hair style and even my friends. Plus, can you believe that they don’t give me pocket money ! Each time I ask for money, they tell me that I don’t need it and that they are providing me with everything I need ask for (it’s in order to avoid the repetition of the verb to need) .
So what do you think my friend I have to do to reach a solution with them ? So, my friend, can you advise me what do I have to do to find a solution with them?
I really want to end my miserable life situation and have a better new relationship with my parents.
Please answer me as soon as you can.
Yours Mariem